My Mum and Dad separated when I was in my late teens and whilst my Dad has moved on to find love again, my Mum has always been very reluctant. The kids recently asked me why Grandma lived on her own, and it got me wondering about whether she was really as happy as I thought she was. This prompted a heart-to-heart and Mum admitted that she does feel lonely sometimes. I’ve been doing all I can to help her to regain her confidence and realise that she deserves to find happiness.
Mum will soon be turning 70 and she has said that she’s “too old to start again” – I really don’t think that’s true! In actual fact, older dating is far more common these days than it ever was before, and it’s about time she realised that she’s far from past it! We’ve been doing a few things to boost her confidence and reassure her that anyone of any age can still date!
Helping her online
Mum is fairly good with technology but she would never admit that! She does get a little bit worried about giving away too many personal details online, and whilst she is right to be cautious, we have been trying to help her to realise where she can let her guard down a little. There are many online dating services specifically geared up for the older generation so I’ve been helping her to set up profiles. She’s already been chatting to somebody who she seems to get along with really well and it’s so nice to see her letting her guard down a little!
Boosting her confidence
One of the biggest issues with my Mum is her lack of self-confidence. I’m forever trying to work on the kids’ self-confidence and some of the things I do with them are also relevant for my Mum too.
I have tried to get Mum out in the fresh air at least once a day as I’m a huge believer in the positive effect that exercise and fresh air has on our mental wellbeing. Her mood and outlook definitely improve after a walk. It also gives her that really valuable “me time” that we all need in order to function at our best.
I have also been helping her to pick out some new clothes online. She lives in comfy clothes at home and as she doesn’t go out much, her wardrobe really did need a few new items. We’ve picked out some really lovely items that help her to feel more confident and comfortable in her own skin whilst also making her look like a million dollars! Body confidence is a really big issue for many of us, particularly as we get older and it can be a huge barrier when it comes to dating.
It’s really important for me that my family have the best life they possibly can, and that goes for my parents as well as for the kids. I hope that by helping Mum to regain her confidence and encouraging her to socialise a little more, she will have more happiness in her life.